Yet Another Song About Weed

Weed...for lack of a better word...is good

I like big buds and I cannot lie
Weed ain't never done nothing to you but make you high
Make your brain multiply
You don't die, you fly
Not with wings
But with dreams and schemes
If ya doing it right
Not of bling and fancy things
But of corporate kings
Your hope springs...eternal
Battling with the infernal
If you do it right
Not the internal
You might be munching on the Colonel
Or spinning the turn...table
If you do it right
You turn the tables
Creating new fables
Getting unstable and unable...

To stop singing another weed song
To stop pulling another weed bong
Dope, green, gage, ganja, grass
Wanna roll with me gotta love the cannibis

I'm so snizzy, they call me snotty
Hit that switch and beam me up Scotty
Get the paper towels, cause I'm making spills
I rolling joints and you're popping pills
Hallucinating, no debating
Sizziling, like Kevin Bacon
Getting baked, riding the snake
This shit ain't shitting, it's so so strong
They sent Chong away too long
All he did was sell a fucking bong
How the fuck do you think that shit is fair?
Come on, come on, answer the question Clare?
Oh dear, I'm clear like a Scientologist
Getting kinda buggy like an etymologist
Getting kinda rocked like an geologist
Using big words like a fake-ass televangelist

And it's time
To stop singing another weed song
To stop pulling another weed bong
Dope, green, gage, ganja, grass
Wanna roll with me gotta love the cannibis

I'm flipping your shit
Like Yoda on space crack
Trying to spot the Enterprise
In the opening of Star Trak
Take a hit, then write a hit
Last week I was on my other, other shit
Does the Prof hit the pipe, like he should?
Does the fucking Pope shit in the woods?
Does Tim Burton always fail to deliver the goods?
Does the KKK look stupid in those fucking hoods?
Do DeGrasse Tyson's words get misunderstood
Time to get high and watch that Cosmos
Follow me pronto and we'll get some tacos
Hit that combo and fulfill my utmost
Figure out how to get high with osmosis
I've had the most and it's almost time

To stop singing another weed song
To stop pulling another weed bong
Dope, green, gage, ganja, grass
Wanna roll with me gotta love the cannibis

Willie smoked weed and he's still doing fine
Miley smoked weed and she's still doing fine
Woody smoked weed and he's still doing fine
Morgan Freeman smoked weed and he's still doing fine
Gaga smoked weed and she's still doing fine
Chappelle smoked weed and he's still doing fine
Jon Stewart smoked weed and he's still doing fine
Martha smoked weed and she's still doing fine
Snoop smoked weed and he's still doing fine
McCartney smoked weed and he's still doing fine

Time to stop singing another weed song
To stop pulling another weed bong
Dope, green, gage, ganja, grass
Wanna roll with me gotta love the cannibals

Hey man, you messed up the line
Fuck it, (inhale) we'll do it live
I'm so fucking high right now

I'll give you my one-hitter when you pry it from my cold, dead hands.